The rules of popularity apply similarly for games as they do for celebrities. With so many of them out there, it is important for them to stand out or they’ll end up in the $5 bin smoking man-pole for crack. The methods for standing out have been varied over time, but it usually involves being unique and entertaining even when you look back years later.

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Others stand out in a negative way for how bad they really were.

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Still others stand out by changing their name to an unpronounceable symbol.

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And you’d think that Quake, one of the franchises that started it all, would be among the greatest of games still today–at least that’s what I thought. I’m wrong way too often.

When I got this, I knew that multiplayer was a big part of the product as it is THE arena game. I had played Quake III in the past and thoroughly enjoyed it, and I expected similar from this rendition. So let it be known, I am fully capable of playing arena multiplayer games successfully. But I start this review with multiplayer because I am completely shocked at how retarded my online experience was. I wasn’t expecting to be a pro immediately, but I thought it would at least be a little easier than it was. It was so ridiculous that I lost all desire to even attempt improving. It’s not an atmosphere friendly to n00bs, but even more, it doesn’t make any sense to me. If Quake 4 is the direction all arena games are heading, then the arena genre will only appeal to a small niche and eventually starve to death (as proven by the lack of servers and even greater lack of players in them). Other realistic multiplayer shooters like Counter-strike have matured over the years in a way that doesn’t discount people from having a good time, no matter their previous experience with the game. Arena games need to mature too, but faster gameplay, butt-loads of guns, more power-ups, and gimmicks are like putting frosting on a burnt cake. Since when do all those things define the genre, and why do the devs think more is better? Get back to the basics or find out the hard way how much your game sucks. I feel slightly better now.

Strangely enough, there is a singleplayer story mode glued to the legendary arena multiplayer. Okay, maybe that’s unfair to say. Singleplayer is actually a major chunk of the game, as it is well done with many hours of gameplay, scripted sequences, diverse characters, pleasant level progression, good friendly and enemy AI, and a huge amount of voice acting. There are even some well done vehicle segments. Space marines, especially on your ship ‘the Hannibal,’ usually have something different to say, making the environment feel alive. And when you’re fighting alongside them, they feel intelligent enough to handle on their own, and the enemies are just as good. You’re also given a wide variety of guns that can occasionally be upgraded to further whoop on the baddies. Big fucking deal.

I’m getting tired of the game industry flooding us with so many games like this. Sure, there’s nothing wrong with the game, but Half-life did all of this in 1998–EIGHT FRIGGIN’ YEARS AGO! Every scripted sequence that came along in Quake 4 seemed like a rip-off of Half-life, and the addition of excessive gore to them doesn’t make them any cooler. And to make things worse, the devs seemed to rely on these run-of-the-mill scripted sequences to add flare and “horror” to the mix. It isn’t terrifying or suspenseful–it merely pisses me off when a Strogg tears through the wall that I can’t avoid walking past because it’s the only way to go. Speaking of that, why are the levels so linear? You run from one hallway to a room to open the door for the next hallway while shooting anything in your way. It’s no fucking wonder that the enemy AI seems so good when all they have to do is run at you without getting stuck on a wall. Don’t even get me started on the boss battles where you have to find the one obscure weakness or trick so you can shoot him “for real” (as if the 50 rockets I previously shot were filled with confetti).

I’m happy that games these days are made to such a high quality and that the standards have been raised, but this game is merely the average because of it. The industry will suffer until developers stop making these same old uninspired games because the market is currently overflowing with them. How are gamers supposed to choose between 20 different demon/alien/evil corporation shooters when they are all based on 2 or 3 licensed engines? Of course each one is functional and has good graphics, but none of them are revolutionary. It further hurts the industry because people can usually only buy one game every so often. So what happens when a gamer gets tired of seeing the same old thing? (as has happened to me) or more importantly, when a potential gamer is pushed away by the abundance of average games that all look the same to the unknowing eye? Shame on you developers and publishers that only push clones to make some extra cash.

At the risk of sounding repetitive, this game is average and feels like it was put out solely for the sake of being another sequel. But this is far from being the only culprit of the crime. I give The Game Formerly Known as Quake 4 an uninspired, plain ol’ average, tired, and typical 3 out of 5.